My life is made up of part time roles; part time mother, part time worker and part time writer (my husband might point out part time wife, sadly all too true, even more of a part time housewife as the thick dust in my house testifies all too well.). I'm a rubbish sister, a distant friend and a busy daughter. Going out is a vague memory and every card is sent late, if at all.
The problem with doing everything part time is that I never feel like I get do any of it really well. I don't stay late at work, leaping out the door the second the clock strikes three (metaphorically of course, I use the computer to tell the time). I have never been to some of our most iconic sites because there isn't time for me to get there and back, if I do have to work late I need a lot of notice - and collect my lieu time religiously not because I begrudge the the time but because I just can't spare it. This explains why I earn less at nearly forty than I did at thirty and have slid so far down the career pole there's no heaving my soon-to-be-middle-aged carcass back up it.
Because I work part time I manage, just, to be around for my 8yo in term time. I drop her off and pick her up from school, remind her to practice her violin no matter the personal pain, go over spellings and times tables and ferry her to a truly staggering amount of activities whilst managing to forcefeed her fruit and veg. There's always more though; her school seems to demand a lot of parent time for sports days, assemblies, concerts, to accompany trips, to read, to run fetes, make flapjacks. I have never once made flapjacks. We rarely stay at the park after school because I need to get back, play dates are few and far between despite my vow to have an open house for her friends. I seem to spend a lot of time promising 'later' but later never materialises.
As for writing. Every spare moment is poured into it to the detriment of pretty much everything else. I make it to the hairdressers twice a year tops because I begrudge using my vital free time for anything but writing. I want to get into a healthy exercise routine but just don't know where to find the time; my latest idea is to get a cross trainer for the house so I can combine reading with exercising. A true multi tasker. And yet progress is painfully slow. Of course the old procrastination is partly to blame for that,
What I need is one of the time turn-back things Hermione uses in the Prisoner of Azkaban, or to be like the Lawrence Block hero who, thanks to a conveniently place bullet, never sleeps. He uses his extra 8 hours a day to learn languages, read great works of literature, sleep with many women and assassinate people. I would use mine to write for four hours a day, exercise, read and to bake flapjacks whenever they were required. I might finally get round to watching Battlestar Galatica and learning to sew on 8yo's Cub badges too.
And just think, with eight extra hours a day how much more procrastinating I could do.
I know how you feel, I've worked part time too, and it's almost as if your day/week is busier than when you were full time.
ReplyDeleteI work 6 days a week and study part time and it's a real struggle to fit in writing. I've actually taken to writing on the bus and in my lunch hour - suspect it will be in the bath next too!
I think we just have to prove everyone wrong and show that actually were are doing what we do pretty well indeed.
I can't comment on your parenting or work, but by spending your extra time writing, it's definitely paying off.
ReplyDeleteI must admit, writing has taken over all my time too and, like you, I start to resent doing anything else with my extra time (my poor hair is suffering!!)
Here's wishing you much success in all your roles ;D
I know that feeling so well! I had a recent moan on my blog about the feeling I wasn't doing anything well and Maisey Yates left me a huge reply detailing all the things she used to do before being published to fit in writing and banish guilt. My house is a pigsty much of the time, I think the key is finding a way not to beat yourself up about it. My big thing, like you, is the three kids, so I try and do their stuff as a priority, then the writing, then last on the list the house.
ReplyDeleteThe one thing I did find that helped loads was 1k a day - it was amazing how that count mounted up and how it enabled me to focus on other things once the words were out of the way.